


In The White House

by LittleSweetCheeks



Series: Gershwin [10]
Category: Madam Secretary
Genre: Angst, F/M, Family, Future, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-28
Updated: 2020-09-28
Packaged: 2021-03-07 19:00:49
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 5,010
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26692609
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LittleSweetCheeks/pseuds/LittleSweetCheeks
Summary: Final installment of the Gershwin series. From election night oward.
Relationships: Blake Moran/Nadine Tolliver, Stevie McCord/Blake Moran
Series: Gershwin [10]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1898866
Comments: 5
Kudos: 7





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> the very beginning of this overlaps the very end of the last one.

She remembers, in the back of a limo on election night, just how good the sex always was between them.

The vehicle is barely moving, and Blake’s pulled her into his lap, pushing her skirt up to allow her to be able to straddle him. His hands are on her hips, hers holding his face as they kiss until they must breathe. He rocks under her before dropping one hand to rub along and then dip past her underwear. She’s soaked and ready from the teasing all night and that kiss when the announcement was made so when she feels his fingers against her core, she rocks against them with a moan.

She keeps the kiss going as his hands pull away, undoing his belt and shoving his pants and boxers down his thighs. Against her, she can feel he’s hot and hard. It feels like an instant and his head is pushing in ever so slightly, waiting, and she sinks down, taking him in. It’s been far too long; she rides him as her body works to stretch to take him in once again. It’s election night, though, and she wants to feel it. “I need more.” She whispers into his ear.

Blake shifts them forward in the seat. “Lean back.” He whispers back, and she does, balancing herself on her hands on the seat behind her. The change in angle pushes him deeper and gives him the angle to pound into her, making her cry out. She’s balanced over the footwell, he’s practically on his knees but neither seem to care. It just feels so damned good to have him back.

She doesn’t even give a thought to the people on the other side of the divider behind her head as she cries out nearly three years of sexual denial until she realizes the following morning that word had already made it back to Elizabeth about what they’d done.

Two months later they will celebrate again, this time on the living room floor of the apartment they’ve been sharing, surrounded by formalwear flung aside and Nadine will decide that retirement is much more fun when she’s being railed at every turn.

==

November and December find her busier than she’s been in years.

She flies alone back to California mostly because she wants to seriously talk to Roman about what she’d like to do, but on the drive from the airport he’s already talking about taking a day off to help her start packing and she realizes that she’s perhaps the last person to know her own mind. He’d met her and the others for dinner one night in the third leg of the campaign, after the point where she and Blake were tentatively returning to friendlier terms. At the time, she’d been nervous about how he would react to meeting Blake in person, but the pair had hit it off almost immediately.

As they’re prioritizing her belongings, Roman tells her it’s good to see her happy and assures her that they’ll be out for a visit as soon as she’s settled.

She gets an offer on her place the same day the listing goes up, so packing takes priority over anything else. Three days in, she opens her door to find Blake standing outside it, anticipation on his face. He has four days cleared but gets her completely packed in two and a half and she’s not sure if that says more about how nomadic she has become with her belongings or about how determined he is to get her back home. They spend the rest of day three on a pile of blankets in what was her living room wearing very little and then once the moving truck leaves the morning of day four, they spend all of that day in a hotel room on the beach wearing even less.

They fly back to Washington together and with every passing hour Nadine remembers more and more what it was like before she messed everything up. They hold hands at every opportunity and when they must wait at the gate, he settles his arm around her, and it feels familiar and good. Her belongings will take another two days to arrive, but Blake had flown with only his day traveler and so they use both tickets to check and fly most of her clothes with them. The housing market in DC isn’t as busy as in California, so she moves in for now with Blake until something comes along. They celebrate Hanukkah together and somehow it means more to her this year that it has in many years, and then they celebrate Christmas with their friends.

After they get back, Blake is busy as part of the transition team, though the notion of transition teams between the Dalton and McCord administrations seems marginally absurd to her. Elizabeth worked in and out of the White House for five years, even had a hand in some of the hiring, and for the most part is already happy with the advisors already selected. He’s busy pulling twelve or more hour days, but she makes sure to be awake and waiting whenever he walks through the door. It’s oddly domestic to suddenly be the woman at home waiting for the first time in her life and she mentions it lightly one night and then teasingly asks him what he wants for dinner.

Two nights later, he calls ahead to be sure she’s home and she’s standing at the stove when he walks in, his trench coat over one arm and a fedora on his head, looking for all the world like something out of a fifties sitcom, and she laughs so hard dinner burns before either of them remember it. “I thought I should look the part.” He laughs once the ruined meal is dealt with before lifting her onto his counter. “What do you think?”

“I think you should keep the hat; it suits you.”

He cants it forward but she pulls it off so she can kiss him. When they pull apart, he places it on her head and then growls before pulling her from the counter and carrying her to the bedroom. “I can’t believe how hard it is to work knowing you’re here waiting for me.” She’s too busy getting them both naked to think of a response.

==

She’s Blake’s plus one the entire day of the inauguration from the swearing in clear through every ball the McCord’s must make an appearance at. They sit together and listen to Elizabeth’s speech in the cold and Nadine finds her hands curled around one of Blake’s in her lap. It’s familiar and comfortable. The kids opt out of the parade, not wanting the publicity, and the rest of the staff are at the White House overseeing the transfer process, but she and Blake walk the short route among the mass of secret service agents. It’s a two-mile walk that makes her realize that she’s still one hundred percent behind her friend no matter what. The last block Elizabeth waves them closer and links arms, four across, as they finish together.

In the lull before the parties start, Nadine seeks out Elizabeth on the second floor of the White House and pitches an idea that makes her semi-unretired, but she’s thrilled when her friend agrees to it.

It’s been years but being Blake’s plus one for galas and parties still comes back to her like the last one was only yesterday. They know almost everyone at every event, know the protocols and know which people to direct their boss’s attention to and which to avoid. She wonders if people realize that presidents only turn up long enough to get announced and maybe have a first dance before leaving again. It’s fun and a little wild, but every time they’re walking into a venue, Blake’s holding her close and pressing a kiss to her cheek and each time they’re walking out, he stops outside the limo and presses another to her lips.

By the time they are on the way to the final event, she’s pulled into his side with her legs over his knee and his face is buried in the curve of her neck. Through the fabric of her dress, she can feel a hand on her side and hates that there’s another stop to make before they head home.

==

It takes nearly two months to close on a house in DC and then it needs some work before she can move in, so Nadine finds herself still sharing Blake’s apartment when spring arrives. It turns out that she’s less an advisor and more simply another confidant with enough security clearance and so she spends days buzzing around the White House lending an ear. She’s granted a space on the second floor to use as she wishes and too soon Blake finds a rhythm in his schedule to sneak up to join her.

They’d sworn never to fuck in the White House, but most days when Blake turns up for lunch, they spend it on the small sofa against one wall, she in his lap. The day they cross that line, he’s wearing a boyish smile as his hand works its way under her skirt until he’s buried two fingers in and kissing her hard to swallow her cries. After that, they’re having sex regularly in her office, that has no glass walls and a locking door now. They get good at being discrete.

She’s sitting on her desk, knees spread wide, and Blake’s on his on the floor, face buried in her when she begins to suspect the jig is up. Faintly in the hall outside her door voices pass and she knows she’s not making enough noise to draw attention, but it also means she’s not making enough to drown the words all the way out. Her mind supplies that someone has mentioned Blake’s name and her attention tries to shift to eavesdropping instead of chasing the building orgasm and she fights the distraction. But then Elizabeth’s voice, even further away, responds and though she doesn’t catch most of it, she does make out enough to realize that they haven’t ben fooling anyone. She thinks the notion will kill her mood, but at that moment Blake adds his thumbs to what he’s doing to her and she forgets where they are.

Euphoria makes her forget until hours later when Elizabeth pops in wearing a smile and then it hits Nadine why the other woman never calls her on what they’ve been doing. It seems lunch breaks in this administration have little to do with food.

Nadine manages to hold out two weeks after she’s told Blake they can’t screw in her office anymore before she gives in again.

He turns up early and looking bothered and a little upset, but she doesn’t press him just yet. Given their line of work, literally anything could be the cause of such a mood. He comes on strong and perhaps a bit desperate and before she can think to finally ask, he’s pinning her on the floor, holding her hands above her head as he nips at her skin. It’s possessive, he’s claiming and marking her, and though she’s not complaining, she can’t work out why.

By the time they’re done he’s been away from his desk more than an hour and she’s checking herself over for rugburns. They redress and he’s back on her again, hands in her hair and pressing a bruising kiss to her lips. “You need to get back.” She whispers, patting his chest. “We can finish this tonight.” She tips her head back to look at him as he nods. There’s something apprehensive in his eyes.

They barely eat dinner before Blake’s pulling her into his lap and kissing her. He’s affectionate and gentle and the amount of focus he’s pouring on her drives her wild. They end up in his bed making love all night and she’s thankful she still has work clothes left at his place. She dozes off and on, Blake follows every impulse the night through to touch or stroke her and by morning she fails to remember the last time she’d had so much sex in one night.

His affection doesn’t end once they reach the White House the next day and it takes most of the day before she becomes aware there’s something afoot she’s not read in on.

She’s sitting in the Oval listening to Elizabeth when Stevie brushes in from the doorway that leads to Blake’s office and heads straight to sit beside her mother. Through the door, Nadine can hear Blake blustering about something and then he appears briefly before pulling the door shut again, his eyes moving between the three women on the couches before he does so. Stevie had turned up at the White House two days before and as far as Nadine could tell, was staying with her parents for a week or two. The young woman chats about the job she’s doing now and other small inconsequential items, all the while Elizabeth is carefully watching her speak, never glancing to Nadine. Then Stevie shares a funny story about something she did with a friend and Nadine realizes she’s heard the story before but from a different perspective. She glances toward her friend, but Elizabeth is doing her best not to make eye contact.

When Stevie excuses herself later, Nadine stays on the spot. “She and…” She can’t even ask it.

Elizabeth stands and moves to the windows, hands in her pockets. “I found out yesterday morning.”

Nadine brings a hand to her face, unsure what to think or do in this moment.

“From what I can gather, it ended before I even called you. He ended it. She’s… she’s not over it. She told him so yesterday morning. That’s when I found out.”

“How… How long?”

Elizabeth turns and faces her. “I don’t know really.” She finally meets her eyes. “After he reconnected with Trevor from what I can gather. Stevie knew about Trevor, but as far as she knows, he never knew about her.”

She tries to process this drastic swing in what she knew of Blake. “He cheated on someone.”

Nadine watches Elizabeth slowly walk her fingers across the desk. It’s a tell she’s done for years and Nadine knows it means she’s choosing each word she’s about to say very carefully. “I told you he didn’t love Trevor. And I really don’t think he loved Stevie. But I think she’s fallen in love with him. While you were gone, he… I’m not making excuses or trying to lay blame, he’s an adult and is the only one responsible for his actions, but he fell apart Nadine.” Nadine watches her hesitate a moment before pressing the intercom button on the phone, summoning Blake who appears almost instantly in the doorway looking eager to do her bidding before reading the room and realizing what conversation must’ve just taken place. “I’ll be upstairs.” Elizabeth says softly before slipping out the side door, leaving them alone.

The room is silent, Nadine has no idea how to even start to ask questions, but one thing niggles in her mind. “Is this why you came on so strong yesterday?” She asks in a whisper.

“I’m sorry.” When she looks up, his eyes are no longer bouncing around the room, but are focused directly on her. “I’m not proud of it and I… I hurt Stevie, even though she knew I was in a relationship. I let myself justify what I did.” She finds she can’t look away as he speaks. There’s sincerity in his eyes. “I love you, Nadine. It’s always been you and I think it always will be. When I started seeing him, it felt like I was cheating on you and I guess… I guess it just made it easier to tell myself I wasn’t doing anything all that bad.”

A thought occurs to her and she decides it says something of Blake’s general character that he hasn’t brought it up to justify himself to her. She’s no saint, she was the other woman for six years and they both know it. It’d be a bit twofaced now to condemn him for similar behavior in a relationship that didn’t even involve her. “It’s easy to tell yourself all the reasons it’s okay to have an affair. In the end, though, it’s yourself you are hurting.”

“I was hurting already. I just spread it around and hurt others.” He shoves his hands in his pockets and ducks his head.

“Come here.” She pats the cushion beside her. “I can’t say I forgive you because you haven’t done anything to me to forgive, except not sharing and really, you don’t owe me an explanation for a time when we weren’t even in contact. I can say I understand, however. And I do wish you would’ve just talked to me yesterday.”

“I was afraid.”

That surprises her. “Of?”

“Of you finding out about Stevie and I and getting jealous. She and I talk, and she’s said some things. Everything fell apart when she told me she still loves me. And… and when she tried to kiss me.”

She realizes that perhaps that’s the thing that he’s the most upset about. He had no qualms cheating on Trevor, but he’d said he didn’t love him; but to her he freely says he loves her at every opportunity. He sinks finally beside her and she makes a decision to not wallow in what-ifs and move past it. She’d caused him enough pain by moving, she couldn’t be angry at how he handled it. “I love you.”

He looks up at her in surprise.

“I love you and this doesn’t change that or anything else.”

He swallows, eyes wide. “You won’t be jealous with Stevie around? She’s been… insistent.”

She reaches up and cups his cheek before threading her fingers into his hair. “I trust you.” She’s aware the eldest McCord daughter has a history of impulsive and poor choices, but those must be her choices and not Blake’s to suffer for.

At that, Blake leans in and kisses her, cupping her face with both his hands. Before she realizes what they’re doing, she’s on her back on the sofa and he’s pressed into her, hips grinding together. Her hands are under his jacket, clinging tight to his shirt at his sides. They seem to forget where they are and one of his hands moves from her cheek to her side, thumb brushing the underside of her breast.

When they finally pull back to breathe, Nadine blinks the ceiling back into focus and swears under her breath. A feeling of being watched tickles her brain and she turns her head and nearly jumps. Elizabeth is standing just inside the doorway, amusement dancing in her eyes. She must’ve returned to check they were okay. Nadine wants to sit up, but Blake’s still covering her body, his face now tucked into her neck against the back of the sofa an she can feel his smile pressing into her neck as he fights a chuckle that shakes his chest. She suspects, though, that the reason he hasn’t moved has to do instead with the line of hardness pressing against her thigh.

Nadine has no idea how to even start to apologize for what she’s sure it looks like they’re doing, but Elizabeth saves her from trying. “Relax, Nadine, one of my first questions was if there were cameras in this room. Your secret will be safe.” The implication is clear enough.

She flushes red and moves her hands to nudge Blake up by his shoulders. He finally leans up, red himself, but wearing a smile that makes him look young and innocent. He leans back down to whisper in her ear. “We can always come back in here later.” It darkens her blush as he pulls back again, this time speaking at a normal volume. “I love you.”

“I take it everything is okay between you then?” Elizabeth asks them both.

“We’re good?” Blake asks down to her specifically, looking for reassurance.

“We’re good.” She nods.

==

She swears she’s fine with it, but as the summer wears on, Stevie is around the White House nearly every day and it’s too easy to see just how taken she still is by Blake who, to his credit, keeps her at arm’s length.

She’s in her new place, which has a stunning view, and Roman and Shindy finally come to visit. Dylan toddles everywhere and she takes time to spend her days chasing him around. Her son and daughter-in-law take a day to themselves and Nadine heads to the Mall with her grandson in a stroller and Blake meets her there. It’s warm and Dylan’s fascinated by the water. She leaves the pair sitting while she walks to a food cart, when she returns, Dylan is laying on his belly, fingers in the water, and Blake’s holding him safely in place with a hand on his back.

The picture they make stops her in place. Blake’s entire face is alight with joy as he talks to her grandson, making funny faces and laughing with him. He eventually pulls Dylan back upright and straightens his clothes just in time for the boy to spot her and take off with a shriek. Unaware his small charge is running toward her, Blake darts after him, catching and scooping him up in a spin. She laughs out loud, drawing his attention and then Blake is settling Dylan on his hip and walking him the rest of the distance as she resumes moving their way.

The remainder of the afternoon is filled with laughter at Dylan’s antics and when Roman and Shindy return, Nadine hands her grandson over and drives to Blake’s apartment for dinner. “Thank you for coming today.”

He lights up again. “No problem, it was a blast.”

“You’ll make a great father one day.” She aims for casual but in his face she can tell she misses by a mile. She’s serious about it, he will make an amazing father, but it would be after they were no longer together.

“Nadine…” He gives her a pained look.

“Blake.” She smiles at him. “Tell me you’re happy giving up that dream. I’ve seen you around kids for years.”

“I- I-”

“I love that I was dragged back to DC and I’m not going anywhere as long as Elizabeth’s in office and probably after too. I guess I’m just a DC animal.” She leads him to the living room and pulls him to sit beside her. “I just don’t want you to miss out.”

“I just got you back.” He looks like he’s already being crushed again.

“And I’m going to stay, but I do want you to seriously consider your future, it goes by in the blink of an eye. I just want you to be happy when it’s over and have no regrets.”

“I’ll think about it.”


	2. Chapter 2

They spend Hanukkah at her place together again. The city is blanketed in deep snow that makes everyone wary to go out if they don’t have to, so the streets are much quieter. Since their conversation over the summer, their relationship had changed incrementally. They carried on working together, spending lunch locked away in her office, and enjoying dinners and shows, but as the weeks wore on, there seemed to be a sadness that slowly took hold.

The tide shifted slightly again when Roman called on Christmas. She and Blake are nestled together under blankets watching It’s a Wonderful Life, which Blake swears is not a favorite, but he knows the entire script by heart. It’s the third shared viewing this season and the tears flow freely from both of them every time. They pause the movie so she can talk to Roman who holds up an ultrasound just like he did before and tells them Dylan will be a big brother soon. It’s a great Christmas present, she’s over the moon for them but later she realizes Blake’s gone quiet.

New Year’s Eve they spend out drinking champagne with friends. Blake’s in rare form, keeping his hands on her all night and by the time the clock counts down, she’s sure it will only take a second to finish her off.

Her place is closer. It’s after one by the time she looks up at him over her in the bed, slowly making love to her. Even after this many years, their coupling is rarely languid and gentle. “Come here.” She tugs him down, savoring his full weight pressing her into the mattress. He always worries about crushing her, but she loves the weight of him. He tucks his hands under her shoulder blades, lifting her into him as their weight rests on his arms. She tips her head up and he obliges, bringing their lips together.

==

In May, they fly together to California. The day they land, Shindy has the baby so most of their week is spent looking after Dylan and then meeting her new grandson. Nadine’s far from surprised at how well Blake interacts with Dylan, they do a day on the beach to distract him from him mommy being away, but when she watches him cradle Declan in his arms and sit in the rocker, it’s another feeling entirely. Blake is so mesmerized by the newborn that Nadine fears he’ll try and sneak him home in a bag or, worse perhaps, Shindy will ask him to stay to help out.

The night before they leave, Nadine’s keeping Shindy company when Roman creeps into the room. “Go have a look in the nursery, mom.” She does, peaking around the door frame. Blake’s in the glider, Declan is tucked into one arm and Dylan is curled against the other. His hands are holding a board book he’s animatedly reading to them. Pulling her phone out, she silently takes a picture to remember the moment.

The boys fall asleep to the story and Blake places Declan in his crib before carrying Dylan out, asking if he needed anything before being tucked in. When Roman calls softly to her once they’re alone, she realizes there are tears in her eyes. “I’m okay.”

==

They’re flying home when the words come out of his mouth softly. “I want that.”

She knows that already. “I know.”

“I love you more than anything in the world.”

“I know that too.”

“What do I do?”

“Find happiness, Blake.” They’ve been fearing this for the better part of six years. “You decide what that will be.”

==

He’s nervous the first time he brings up taking Stevie to dinner, but she assures him she understands. When it actually happens, Elizabeth calls and invites her to dinner at the White House and there starts a new pattern. Their relationship changes drastically, no longer physical, and yet still intimate in other ways. Through fall he mentions every dinner, every night out with Stevie before setting it up and every night it happens, she ends up spending the evening with Elizabeth and Henry.

As the air cools and leaves change, so they do again as well. He tells her his plans as if she were only a friend, no longer seeking permission, and she’s thrilled for him. One morning a week before Halloween, Elizabeth appears in her small office and shuts the door. “Stevie didn’t come home last night.” Her voice is sad. It’s the end of an era, so to speak.

The next time Elizabeth appears it’s almost Thanksgiving. “Stevie’s invited him to dinner. I’m inviting you because you are my friend and are important to me, but I wanted you to know that first.” She hesitates. “He looks happy, what do you think? Not like when he was with Trevor.”

Nadine must agree.

December is different this time. The McCord’s aren’t Jewish but are used to Henry’s decades of religion lectures and Hanukkah is a family affair. Christmas is as well.

As soon as she turns up at the White House on Christmas morning, Nadine can see in Blake’s face exactly what is coming. He looks guilty and pleased and nervous all rolled into one and before he says a word, she whispers in his ear. “Congratulations.” His eyes widen, but he doesn’t ask for what.

==

When the following June arrives, Nadine knocks gently on a doorframe. She has a bouquet of flowers in her hand for Stevie, two small gift bags hanging in her fingers, and a box for Blake. Stevie’s asleep, but Blake tugs her silently over and they peer together into a pair of tiny bassinets. Jacob and Samuel. And she wonders aloud if anyone will have girls ever again. It seems the last girl born was Daisy’s daughter years ago.

“I know it’s not… We’re trying to combine our religious backgrounds so… I would love it if you would be their godmother.”

She arches a brow at him in amusement. Judaism doesn’t do godparents, though it doesn’t surprise her in the least that the McCord’s would given Henry’s Catholic upbringing. “I would be honored.” One of the babies starts to fuss, setting the other to squirming almost instantly and Nadine moves back a bit, finding a place for the gifts as Blake curls both babies into his arms expertly. He sways his sons and she feels her heart breaking and at the same time feeling overfilled with joy. “You look happy.”

The smile she receives after that is unlike anything she’s ever seen from him before. “I never knew this kind of happy existed.” He stares down at the newborns. “Sit over there.” He gestures with his chin. “You can hold them.”

She sits and takes one infant and stares. They look like miniature versions of Blake and it blows her away. Blake carefully pulls another chair over so they’re sitting side by side. “The best part of your life has just begun.”


End file.
